Need to write 100+ dad jokes about bitcoin for a client.
One liners / jokes, rather than memes.
Please share your best and allow me to steal. 😄
I will zap the my top ten jokes 210 sats (and will credit you).
#asknostr #jokes #dadjoke
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Replies (92)
Not mine:
Why won’t the government embrace #Bitcoin ?
They hate the idea of Proof Of Work! 😂
@npub142nw...wkj3 has you covered.
One of my fav memes by @MaxisClub
GIVE THIS MAN SOME DAD JOKES!
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Expecting great things...
my bot has been posting bangers for a while now lol
How do you spot a real Bitcoiner at a party?
Don’t worry, they’ll tell you. 🤣 🤣 🤣
My mom asked if I was still jobless.
I said, “I’m not jobless, Mom; I’m early.” 🤣 🤣
Why did the Bitcoiner get kicked out of therapy?
He kept interrupting to say “Bitcoin fixes this.” 😂 🤣 😂 🤣
Eeesh. This one hits too close to home.
Same feeling
I told my wife she is like Bitcoin. She said, "Awww that's so sweet, is it because you think I'm valuable? I said, "Well, it's because I can't predict what you'll do next!" 😁
@corndalorian @npub19cql...hgvc @npub1xdxu...z7aj @npub1zfre...gjmv @Rod Palmer 📯 Bugle News #40HPW🎧 @walker can you help me out?
Son: "Dad are we rich?"
Dad: "We are Bitcoin rich my boy"
Son: "So can we get some pizza?"
Dad: "Not this cycle, son"
I had a huge fight about Bitcoin with the wife last week. She accused me of being emotionally unavailable. I said to her, "That's not true, i just prefer cold storage." 😁
Id give you my 2 cents but in Canada we dont have pennies. Best I can do is 2 sats.
Why do bitcoin miners need so much water to send a bitcoin transaction? So they can fill their mempools.
XRP.
That’s the joke
Why did the Bitcoin go to therapy?
It had trust issues.
Why did the United States federal reserve start a bakery?
Because they know how to knead dough.
Why don’t bitcoiners eat spaghetti? They don’t like forks.
Why did the Bitcoin miner bring a ladder to work?
I mean, just look at the blockheight.
Why do bitcoin investors want a Lambo?
Because they know Ferarri is owned by Fiat
How do you make a small fortune from investing in Bitcoin?
Start off by investing a large fortune in Bitcoin.
Why did the nocoiner go to the doctor during double digit inflation?
He had a bad case of FOMO.
Forking good joke 🍝
🤣🫡
Why did the shitcoin go to the casino?
It heard the house always wins.
😂🤣
Superman is useless on Wednesday evening because he goes to a weekly Bitcoin meet up.
It's his Crypto-night.
How can you tell who owns bitcoin at a party?
Don't worry, they'll tell you.
Why did the nocoiner avoid Bitcoin?
Cause he’s a retard.
Son: Hey dad, can I borrow ten dollars in Bitcoin?
Dad: Twenty dollars and thirteen cents? Why in God's name do you need to borrow nine dollars and sixty-seven cents?
Bitcoin has brought my family closer together over the years … we live in 1-bedroom now.
What's a bitcoiner's favorite fruit?
Orange
What's a bitcoiner's favorite scary movie?
Scare City
Not a only a memer, but a standup comedian as well Mr corn.
I don't own a lot of Bitcoin, just a little bip.
Craig wright.
A daughter shows her banker father her work on Bitcoin's lightning network to speed up transactions, in response he ask's her if she would like to hear his opinion on Bitcoin. She replies yes.
"It's worthless" her father says
"I know" She replies "But let's hear it anyway"
A vegan bitcoin investor who owns a Tesla, does CrossFit, and refused to vote in the last election walks into a bar
The real question is, what he’s going to bring up first?
That's just cruel!
But he IS a fucking joke.
I was going to tell a fiat joke instead, but it's already worthless.
Wherever you find four bitcoiners, you'll find a fifth.
Bitcoiner's breakfast menu:
Private key lime pie yoghurt
Hash rate browns
Cold storage brewed coffee
An orange
Stay humble and stack of pancakes
3 coins get into a bar fight, Bitcoin, Ethereum, and xmr. Bitcoin easily won because of it's decentralized nature; it wasn't even there.
Knock knock
Who's there
Orange
Orange who?
Orange you glad I didn't say crypto
Q: What is a bitcoiner's favourite car brand?
A: Fiat
What day of the week do we feel most decentralized?
SAT-urday!!
Least favorite
Price always pumps on Moonday.
Why do all musicians love bitcoin? Because it's sound money.
ChatGPT ?
Why did the Bitcoiner break up with his bank?
Because Lightning struck — and the relationship just couldn’t settle fast enough.
Your post is in itself a joke: you want us to write the jokes for you.
Lazy bastard...
Send me 1 bitcoin joke and I'll send you 2 back
In questionable taste, given the generally wholesome nature of dad jokes, and no doubt technically inaccurate, but here goes.
Why did the pervert make a hash of things? He was looking for minors, but ended up with a load of nonces.
I've got 21 million problems but the Bitc(oin) ain't one.
My wife said I never listen anymore. I told her I stopped hearing noise after I found signal in the timechain.
Why don’t Bitcoins ever get lost? They always follow the block-chain home!
Talk about a blow off top
Can you get this round? I left my wallet buried at an undisclosed location.
I ran out of gas driving to buy more Bitcoin. Now, it’s truly a gas-less transaction.
Why did the dad start mining Bitcoin?
Because he heard it was the best way to make “cents” out of the blockchain!
a bitcoiner walks into a bar and orders a martini. the bartender says "shaken?" to which the bitcoiner says "no... stir."
I can't zap you!
Wife: I checked our bank account and the balance is ZERO?! Didn’t you say say sold our Fiat?
Maxi Husband: No, that Fiat is still in the garage.
Chuck Norris just spent the 21,000,001st bitcoin
- How far is Bitcoin from worldwide adoption?
- Just a few blocks away! 😎
There were two types of money...
How do you call a semi Bitcoin celebrity?
“A kind of a miner celebrity.”
How do you comfort a friend who lost money on Bitcoin?
You just say, “HODL me.”
How does Satoshi Nakamoto stay in shape?
Lots of proof-of-work outs.
told my wife I put all our savings in Bitcoin. She said “thats not funny”
I said “dont worry, it’ll eventually make cents”
Ahh good ol times..I miss the Chuck Norris jokes 😄
Multisig hive mind for the win.
What is tiny and can't stand up?
A sat
Core blimey
this is knots
What is loud, always hot, every day hooked to the internet and does nothing more than hanging and guessing?
A miner
Why don't node runner run?
Are they afraid of lightning?
A nerd minor doesn't have much brains.
Crazy. Software in a hardware wallet that's not hot but called cold storage.
Q: What do #Bitcoin /#BTC dads eat for breakfast? 💁♂️
A: Hash browns, obviously. 😏
That's all I got, lol. 🤙
*goes to #Bitcoin / #BTC house for dinner*
The Dad:
"I'd offer you a seat, but we just sold all our chairs & before you even ask about the chicken, there is no second breast." 😏
Dad: Hows Bitcoin?
U: It's going up.
Dad: SELL!!!
Planned to make more improvements to asknostr.site tonight but i was browsing the top questions and got distracted.
Great content:
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🙏
Oh just saw this now! Sorry about that. What were the results?