Noob question about relays. Can a note be send to one relay only, and not be spread through other relays. So only users that are connected to that relay see the notes? If so, any guide to built one would be higly appreciated.

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You can choose to send to only that relay, and then only those who have read permissions from that relay will be able to view it, but there is currently no way to prevent them from rebroadcasting out to other relays that I am aware of.