For the last half a year or so I’ve been in a deeper contemplation of what I know, what I don’t know and where it feels true to put my energy.
I’ve wondered about the point of it all. I’ve listened to what energy actually feels true to express.
I have had periods of real conviction in the last few years and periods of going from “I know” to “I don’t know at all” (many of these recently) and these have been really important. They have taken me back down to the quiet places of finding what I do know, below the loudness of cultural discourse.
They have also taken me to seeing where I actually am with my beliefs, in person. Seeing what I can hold in my system when discussing with the person in front of me rather than blasting from the rooftops behind my screen. It’s refined me and challenged me in the best of ways.
Something that feels really clear to me today is that no matter where we exist on the spectrums of beliefs, we did not come down here to sit on the sidelines and watch life unfold in front of us. We did not choose this human 3D experience to simply check out. Every person who comes into my life teaches me something because of who they are and what they stand for.
These past few months, I’ve been introduced to many new things because people spoke about what they cared about.
This is just as much a message to me right now as it is to you.
I think about being on my death bed often and how I want to feel. I think about what it will take from me to live a really full life.
I’ve had moments where I imagine my to life to be quite simple and small. And, any time I start going down that path, I feel the deeper part of me that fires up the engine to remind me there’s more.
We each play a role in the creation of this world. Neutrality does not create. Over intellectualizing does not create. Overriding of self does not create. Believing Nothing does not create.
There are many things arranging into place for me and so much is nebulous at the moment. But I wanted to come on here and share this. Because this is what I know today.
