Liking these posts. Relatable, though in a much more diluted form for me. I'm probably more of an introvert than anything, and one who finds conversations outside their interests tedious; instead of a need to stim (that much be an annoying urge to fight off), I simply have genuine trouble staying engaged in most conversations. My mind wants to wander and mull over whatever it is that has me engaged at that time, and it's somewhat like fighting an urge to pee when I have to endure prolonged "boring" conversations.
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Once upon a time I didn't think I stimmed either. A lot of us quit or find very subtle ways so we aren't harassed. Stimming serves a purpose and suppressing it has a very real costs. I'm putting conscious effort into relearning stimming, trying new methods and seeing how they work for me.
Made a simple begleri. I suck at it but I like it. Ordered a deadeye and a knucklebone to try. Looking for effective things that aren't disruptive. Nothing noisy for example because the noise might actually be disruptive to some people.