people dont like to feel beholden
beholden feels manipulative and exhausting
this cultural is very unwell and transactional
takes a lot to learn that some things really are free, would happen with or without you, exist beyond reciprocity, simply are
a tree does not grow branches and leaves to make shade for you in the summer
a tree does not grow to become your firewood or a chair
a tree is on their own tip doing their own thing, can be grateful for the shade, but it wasnt made for you