Yuk...

Whaaat! Nonpoisonous snakes have cute faces! But he was very aggressive...

Sssssssfuckoffsssssssss Like that?

Water snake?

Das a pretty fren.

Yeah basically. We had a standoff. I had a long rake and this guy was eyeing me down, darting his head back and forth. Lunged at my rake a few times. His tail was rattling but he doesnt have a rattler.

Yep!

The coloration is still quite vivid and we found his skin just yesterday. Probably only a teenager. Hes gonna get YUGE.

Noice!

Yeah it was wild. I was going around the corner with a garden cart full of soil and almost stepped on the snake. He was not happy abt that... then as we're staring each other down, I see a turtle in my neighbors bushes. I call my kids down to see and then my daughter goes, theres a deer too in the backyard! Tonight will be another night in the trenches defending my garden again against the raccoons who love to dig my garden just to be assholes.

Ride the snake. To the lake. The blue bus. Is calling us.