@AnnSofiNovelist probably is a good person for you to look at to understand better how nostr works. she's a kind of a public figure, she writes books, and she journals extensively on nostr. @Laeserin is more of a polemicist and rhetorician and, frankly, politician, but her personal work is also around databases and she has done quite a bit of development of clients and possibly her work might fit you better than whatever client you are using. Nostr is just an entirely different thing to regular social media. you can't change how it works, those things define what it is. the algorithm doesn't really protect anyone. it protects the advertiser income stream for the company running the thing, and as far as that aligns with the user, it has advantages over this free-for-all of nostr. but it fails in other ways because its whole purpose is to induce confession and make everyone essentially open themselves up to being covertly attacked. on nostr, that is already a given, the difference is nobody has privilege about how to access that data. as for gender differences, i'm not going to enter into that subject area any further. i'm not busy thinking about the interior decoration of nurseries or the business of gynacologists or the details of discussing one's husband or children's behaviour or being offended about gender issues. those are things that are interesting to women because they involve women. there is no "common room" in a protocol like nostr. if you don't like what you are reading, stop following the disscussion. or mute the person whose words bother you. everything is up to you here, nobody is going to hide things automatically or guide you, you are on your own until you establish friendships with other users. it's different, and the ways it is different are more about the incentives of who runs the servers and builds the clients than anything else, and those originate in the architecture, and the principle of free speech and anyone can run their own nostr, with blackjack and hookers if they want.