Bitcoin should have been feature complete before segwit in my opinion. I don't care about vaults, I don't care about multi-party lightning. I care about hard money that can't be debased or stolen, that's it.
My "absolutist" position is simply that bitcoin is working perfectly fine and all your new opcodes are an attack on the network and completely unnecessary for bitcoin's success.
If it aint broken, don't fix it.
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Right, so no lightning at all for you then?
At least that's consistent. No zaps for you then!