I hate the privacy implications, but Breez SDK was the most efficient way for me to get an LN wallet into my app. I hoped accessing it through TOR and regularly rotating keys would work. But they block TOR access. As soon as you have a legally accessible entity operating a service, privacy will be strangled.

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Use XMR. If that is absolutely not possible and you want to use custodial LN use Cakewallet over Tor that uses the same SDK. Ideally you get a new seed for your LN wallet each time you use it funding it with Monero if you don't want to link your spark activity.