I’ve described it as your entire life passing through the eye of a needle. Instant meaning. Instant connection to god. To the all. Instant overwhelm. All the pain? Every mistake, every embarrassment, every unfairness, every negative thing in your life suddenly perfect, because they led you to this moment. To this child and of course it had to be this child. It could not have been any other. A sacred duty bestowed on you by god the father and the suddenly it all make sense. It always was you. Hey little one. It’s me dad.
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I say amen to that. Whenever I think of the question “if you could go back in time, what would you change?” … the answer is easy: nothing. Not a thing. Everything, good or bad or in between, led to this moment and this child. Any other path taken and he wouldn’t exist, and I wouldn’t trade his existence for the world.
I have had this exact same thought. Followed by.. ok now every mistake or fault is 1000x more consequential abd amplified lol. In one day everything in past gets incredibly light while the future weighs infinitely heavy
