I would rather have a relay that protects me from clients than trust the clients to be sanely written. I think relays have a long way to go.
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you cannot trust the clients in a decentralized network. that is why the relay must use common techniques to prevent abuse.
BUT the client must also implement sane data access and connection patterns for the client to work at all.
in this particular case I will guarantee you the vibe coded client is doing terrible things with websocket connections and queries. that is step one to making the client work.
^ And relays only scale well currently because clients assume poor consistency and load balancing and reconciliation happens at the client. And more specifically because nostr users can't really know any better.