Filter.nostr.wine also works, but I haven't used them much. Just keep in mind they disable the outbox mode entirely.

I run my own wot relay, and it is pulling in notes from my follows, and their follows. Is that helping me see more notes, since I have it as in and outbox was well? Is there a better way for me to be using that?

Hum.. that could be ideal for the proxy spot. Just make sure it does import everything from your contacts.