By the way this is why DHTs work; they structure relays/nodes so each bunch (~8-20) are the rendezvous of specific topic.
I think the Outbox Inbox framing is good solution, so I only read notification from few relays...
However this doesn't work for global open chats because... Where the fuck should I send my replies to a thread with 300 participants? What about lurkers who still engaged? Do I send the reply to everyone relays?
Well in that case you better hope for relays centralisation
