Depends. In many cases, and in principle, yes.
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Okay, but the relay isn't required to store my message and they can delete my message whenever they want. The only way I can guarantee my message is stored for as long as I want it to be is for it to be stored on my local device or my own relay?
Depends. In many cases, and in principle, yes.
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That's right
It's also worth highlighting the fact that whilst notes MAY be removed, they CANNOT be modified (else they wouldn't validate)