ChipTuner's avatar
ChipTuner ChipTuner@gitcitadel.com 6 days ago
If we're being serious, my arguments are, look at the crowd. A bunch of at minimum privacy aware fringe (relative to big tech platforms). We consist of less than 10 women, most of which are married and a bunch of dudes probably in their mid to late 30s. If you have used any of the "fringe" but popular dating apps/websites you find one "woman" within 100 miles of you, if you move the range to include Washington DC and northern Virginia you get a few more "women". You have to build real trust, which means you must expose private information over an online system. I know I have a bias against dating apps (because they simply don't work for the majority of users) and people can't keep pointing to the 1/100 users that entered their first marriage at 23 that no one was invited to and are too socially awkward to leave their house.
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codonaft's avatar
codonaft _@codonaft.com 6 days ago
> You have to build real trust, which means you must expose private information over an online system I've pointed out something close in the article I mentioned: IMO it's possible to achieve a healthy and flexible enough privacy for dating (so people could feel safe to talk to strangers using pseudoanonymous and almost empty npubs, and still not appear as a total stranger/s{p,c}ammer to the system, by exposing the connection between the real trusted npub and the limiting dating one to a trust rank service, that real npub holder chooses themselves). That's the inevitable trade-off: something would need to be exposed in order for such a system to work, but privacy depends a lot on what exactly and who will receive the information. I think it's worth trying to build dating capabilities in Nostr, because the alternative is actually dating apps that do (or will start doing at any moment) the ID-based KYC cringe, which makes things worse for whoever doesn't care that much about privacy. I believe that people will go here if they notice a healthier alternative and if we market it in a particular way. > We consist of less than 10 women While I don't ask for statistics that support this, hopefully non-literal, claim (I see who's naturally attracted here at the moment too), I still don't want it to be some self-fulfilling prophecy. Nostr is not just for male hackers and bitcoiners, and we affect who actually gets attracted to it. For example by making @Divine HQ (I'm still impressed it hit the 10k TestFlight limit in a few hours!) or possibly some dating app too. > If you have used any of the "fringe" but popular dating apps/websites you find one "woman" within 100 miles of you > they simply don't work for the majority of users I hear it all the time, ah. I haven't been doing this since all the AI psychosis started in particular, but anyway, for some reason I was always lucky with these dating services. I found my significant other about 5 years ago using one of them, just as one of the examples. And I'm in my mid 30s right now. But that was not in the US.
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