You can have a private relay that only certain npubs can write to, which is what mine is, and only my wife and I can write to it. However, everyone can read from it.
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Which relay software did you use for this? I set up a personal node without auth, many others started using it unprompted and I blew through my bandwidth quota! Had to turn it off.
Mine is LAN only 😎
Well yeah, if it's blocked by a NAT or a firewall, sure. I specifically route for mine to be accessible from the outside world.