I've been using my Lightning node for 5+ years now. I think it's pretty easy, for me, but I'm not the other 99.99% of the world.
I agree that custodial is easy for everyone, but there are trade offs.
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Bitcoind? easy.
Tor? easy.
LND? easy.
systemd? oh fuck everything whose idea was this piece of shit anyway?
I wonder if it's too late to switch to BSD on my raspi...