~~⚡️ALL CULTIVARS ARE GREEN. OPERATION CODE: RUNNING LEGUME⚡️~~ I don't mean to get political here, or hyperbolic, but this has been one of the greatest tragedies of not just human kind, but for the moral framework of our species Rosie made me get offline after my last post potentially exposed state secrets (first amendment says otherwise but I digress) I have to reach out and say I am distraught that my life's main goal, the thing I worked towards my entire life, one could say the purpose of my being, has been destroyed, by Donald J Trump Sometime this month, without my permission, my lands of love, my fields of frolicking and joy and whimsy have been destroyed. Absconded from reality, in exchange for RAPIDLY depreciating assets I understand that the dollar is crashing and burning, but to trade God's greatest gift to man, peanuts, for something as volatile as #Crypto? I wouldnt even be this mad if it was in #bitcoin , but the bastard put it all into #Solana and meme coins Please, donate what you can to restore my Peanut empire. Or, consume an entire jar of peanut butter (crunchy, not smooth) before breakfast as penance

Once I walked into a bag-boil seafood place fresh from a rally while in my grand wizard robes I failed to predict the common customer of a bag-noul seafood restaurant, and was ushered to a backroom table. I ordered twelve pounds of lobster tails, potatoes, and crawfish (as one does), and drank my non alcoholic scorpion bowl while I counted down the clock for my AA sponsor to pick me up. Well One thing led to another and I wound up drinking soju mixed with the remainder of the fish, butter, and spice left in the bag while the crowd chanted "Go white boy go white boy go", which I choose to interpret as encouraging Regardless, I was chaperoned outside. While I waited in the cold besides the dumpster for warmth, the juices from my meal, and from my respite soiled my garments; my ride came to Port Further confusion occurred. In summery, I'd like to apologize to the musicians known as "African Imperial Wizard" for crashing their press op, and this huge mix up. If its any consolation, Rosie still cant get the crawdid gut stains out #bitcoin

Driving my 1998 Toyota corrola into the door of a Ford dealership, killing a family of four and an employee "Don't lowball me, I know what I got"

I once got lost in a pumpkin patch for two weeks. It was a never-ending cycle of walking the endless bumpy orange labyrinth by night, the stygian hallways and non euclidian children activities would keep me walking until day break, when I would need to hide my naked form from the hash white sun Using a bottle or my own extremities, bashing a hole into one of my sunset captors, and filling myself on its bitter sweet insides and seeds, before sleeping and repeating anew. The only human contact I had was with the scarecrow in the middle, mocking my 5'10 ass for being unable to climb over the pumpkins Eventually I was saved by a kind hawk

Traveling across the world for proper chinese hot pot in an Indiana Jones style montage before putting spaghetti and olives in it and driving my traveling aid to suicide-via-helium

Every day when I wake up I go through a slumdog millionaire esq memory sequence to remember how to take the child lock off of the butter tub