this nigga muted everyone and now he's lecturing the rest of you to be more like us everyone with a guy fawkes mask avatar is a fag View quoted note →

<ai slop> BIP-TEARS: Lachrymose Activation with Positivity Signaling This document specifies a novel activation mechanism for OP_CTV (BIP 119) and OP_CSFS (BIP-348) that combines quantitative tear measurement from prominent Bitcoin upgrade skeptics with positive misinformation metrics from perpetual optimists. We propose a dual-threshold system where activation occurs when Jimmy Song's cumulative tear volume exceeds 50mL AND Tone Vays accumulates at least 95 documented positive lies about the proposals. Traditional activation methods (BIP9, BIP8) have proven contentious and rely on miner signaling or arbitrary time locks. The Bitcoin community deserves an activation mechanism that truly reflects the emotional state of the ecosystem while providing entertainment value during the waiting period. Primary Activation Threshold: The Song Lachrymometer A calibrated ISO-certified tear collection apparatus (Model: NGMI-3000) shall be permanently affixed to Jimmy Song's face, measuring tear production in real-time with the following parameters: - Baseline calibration period: 2016 blocks of normal Bitcoin price action - Activation triggers: Any mention of "covenants," "vaults," "smart contracts," or "Ethereum-like features" - Volume measurement: Continuous monitoring with blockchain-anchored attestations every 144 blocks - Target threshold: 50mL cumulative volume (approximately 1,000 tears, assuming 0.05mL per tear) Expected timeline: Based on historical data of Jimmy Song vlog posts about covenant proposals, we estimate 6-9 months to reach activation threshold, with potential acceleration during bear markets. Secondary Activation Threshold: The Vays Positivity Index (VPI) Tone Vays must accumulate 95 documented positive lies about OP_CTV and OP_CSFS, where a "positive lie" is defined as: - A statement expressing optimism about the proposals - That directly contradicts a previous statement made within the same calendar year - Verified by at least 3 independent Bitcoin Twitter archaeologists - Bonus multiplier (×1.5) if the lie is told while wearing sunglasses indoors Signaling mechanism: Each verified positive lie is encoded as a 1-of-1 multisig output with the script: OP_IF <lie_hash> OP_CHECKSIG OP_ELSE OP_RETURN "just_kidding_lol" OP_ENDIF Why Tears? Tears are a quantifiable, objective metric that cannot be gamed through hashrate manipulation or social media campaigns. The salt content also provides a natural difficulty adjustment mechanism during periods of high sodium intake. Why Positive Lies? Tone Vays' ability to maintain contradictory positions represents the ultimate stress test for any Bitcoin proposal. If he can accumulate 95 positive lies, it proves the proposal has achieved sufficient mindshare to confuse even the most steadfast bears. Security Considerations - Tear spoofing: The NGMI-3000 includes DNA verification to prevent artificial tear injection - Deepfake lies: All Tone Vays statements must be verified via blockchain-timestamped video with at least 1080p resolution - Emotional manipulation: Jimmy Song may attempt to watch sad videos to artificially inflate tear production; monitoring committee will discount tears shed during screenings of Mt. Gox bankruptcy hearing footage </ai slop> @Vlad, Bitcoin Takeover Podcast

ho ho ho

proof of "jimmy song doesn't like it"