OMG I feel accomplished and abused. 4 hours, 5 total tech texhnicians of varying degrees of intelligibility and skill, one phone death where I lost every bit of work up to that point considered slitting my wrists, finally a tech dude of tolerable English, and a pulse. My scanner driver is now completely installed, my network connection is more deeply understood and why do Godforsaken ethernet not do bleeping USB cable performances, and they matter if you need reliable connections (in the swamp).
At last. I can print satisfactorily, I can copy. I can scan and send the files to a known geographic location, after setting limits and parameters that work for me. Praise be to God!
Beeswax therapy is mo’ def’ indicated.
Don’t hate me for the cheap green parafin candle, (they never measure up to 100% beeswax), it was in the sale bin at Micheal’s, which is next door to Best Buy (Geek Squad was unable to help, even after 45 minutes and going to the advanced tech support. Canon Tech Support, after two dubious creatures, got me to Zach, and he got me to printer Valhalla (and yes I feel dead inside, but triumphant).