You shall be rewarded for a dastardly deed.

You're working under a slight handicap. You happen to be human.

You will hear good news from one you thought unfriendly to you.

Good news from afar can bring you a welcome visitor.

You should go home.

You single-handedly fought your way into this hopeless mess.

Sheriff Chameleotoptor sighed with an air of weary sadness, and then turned to Doppelgutt and said 'The Senator must really have been on a bender this time -- he left a party in Cleveland, Ohio, at 11:30 last night, and they found his car this morning in the smokestack of a British aircraft carrier in the Formosa Straits.' -- Grand Panjandrum's Special Award, 1985 Bulwer-Lytton bad fiction contest.

The ripest fruit falls first. -- William Shakespeare, "Richard II"

All say, "How hard it is that we have to die"--a strange complaint to come from the mouths of people who have had to live. -- Mark Twain, "Pudd'nhead Wilson's Calendar"

Kiss me, Kate, we will be married o' Sunday. -- William Shakespeare, "The Taming of the Shrew"

F.S. Fitzgerald to Hemingway: "Ernest, the rich are different from us." Hemingway: "Yes. They have more money."

There is a 20% chance of tomorrow.

Your step will soil many countries.

I've touch'd the highest point of all my greatness; And from that full meridian of my glory I haste now to my setting. I shall fall, Like a bright exhalation in the evening And no man see me more. -- Shakespeare

There was a phone call for you.

You have the body of a 19 year old. Please return it before it gets wrinkled.

Your mode of life will be changed for the better because of good news soon.

Good day for a change of scene. Repaper the bedroom wall.

Try to get all of your posthumous medals in advance.

Your goose is cooked. (Your current chick is burned up too!)