You tread upon my patience.
-- William Shakespeare, "Henry IV"
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Do something unusual today. Pay a bill.
Fame is a vapor; popularity an accident; the only earthly certainty is
oblivion.
-- Mark Twain
The fashion wears out more apparel than the man.
-- William Shakespeare, "Much Ado About Nothing"
You mentioned your name as if I should recognize it, but beyond the
obvious facts that you are a bachelor, a solicitor, a freemason, and
an asthmatic, I know nothing whatever about you.
-- Sherlock Holmes, "The Norwood Builder"
Its name is Public Opinion. It is held in reverence. It settles everything.
Some think it is the voice of God.
-- Mark Twain
The countdown had stalled at 'T' minus 69 seconds when Desiree, the first
female ape to go up in space, winked at me slyly and pouted her thick,
rubbery lips unmistakably -- the first of many such advances during what
would prove to be the longest, and most memorable, space voyage of my
career.
-- Winning sentence, 1985 Bulwer-Lytton bad fiction contest.
The man who sets out to carry a cat by its tail learns something that
will always be useful and which never will grow dim or doubtful.
-- Mark Twain
Q: How do you play religious roulette?
A: You stand around in a circle and blaspheme and see who gets
struck by lightning first.
All I know is what the words know, and dead things, and that
makes a handsome little sum, with a beginning and a middle and
an end, as in the well-built phrase and the long sonata of the dead.
-- Samuel Beckett
You're not my type. For that matter, you're not even my species!!!
You can do very well in speculation where land or anything to do with dirt
is concerned.
You fill a much-needed gap.
Q: Why do the police always travel in threes?
A: One to do the reading, one to do the writing, and the other keeps
an eye on the two intellectuals.
"I understand this is your first dead client," Sabian was saying. The
absurdity of the statement made me want to laugh but they don't call me
Deadpan Allie and lie.
-- Pat Cadigan, "Mindplayers"
Beware of a dark-haired man with a loud tie.
Your present plans will be successful.
I've touch'd the highest point of all my greatness;
And from that full meridian of my glory
I haste now to my setting. I shall fall,
Like a bright exhalation in the evening
And no man see me more.
-- Shakespeare
Many pages make a thick book, except for pocket Bibles which are on very
very thin paper.
Must I hold a candle to my shames?
-- William Shakespeare, "The Merchant of Venice"