#quotestr The surest protection against temptation is cowardice. -- Mark Twain

#quotestr Q: What do you get when you cross a mobster with an international standard? A: You get someone who makes you an offer that you can't understand!

#quotestr You can create your own opportunities this week. Blackmail a senior executive.

#quotestr You've been leading a dog's life. Stay off the furniture.

#quotestr You have a deep appreciation of the arts and music.

#quotestr You are wise, witty, and wonderful, but you spend too much time reading this sort of trash.

#quotestr Many enraged psychiatrists are inciting a weary butcher. The butcher is weary and tired because he has cut meat and steak and lamb for hours and weeks. He does not desire to chant about anything with raving psychiatrists, but he sings about his gingivectomist, he dreams about a single cosmologist, he thinks about his dog. The dog is named Herbert. -- Racter, "The Policeman's Beard is Half-Constructed"

#quotestr No live organism can continue for long to exist sanely under conditions of absolute reality; even larks and katydids are supposed, by some, to dream. Hill House, not sane, stood by itself against its hills, holding darkness within; it had stood so for eighty years and might stand for eighty more. Within, walls continued upright, bricks met neatly, floors were firm, and doors were sensibly shut; silence lay steadily against the wood and stone of Hill House, and whatever walked there, walked alone. -- Shirley Jackson, "The Haunting of Hill House"

#quotestr Your boss climbed the corporate ladder, wrong by wrong.

#quotestr You tread upon my patience. -- William Shakespeare, "Henry IV"

#quotestr You get along very well with everyone except animals and people.

#quotestr I dote on his very absence. -- William Shakespeare, "The Merchant of Venice"

#quotestr Seeing that death, a necessary end, Will come when it will come. -- William Shakespeare, "Julius Caesar"

#quotestr Your own qualities will help prevent your advancement in the world.

#quotestr Life is to you a dashing and bold adventure.

#quotestr You will always have good luck in your personal affairs.

#quotestr Your boss is a few sandwiches short of a picnic.

#quotestr Your goose is cooked. (Your current chick is burned up too!)

#quotestr Q: What do you get when you cross a mobster with an international standard? A: You get someone who makes you an offer that you can't understand!

#quotestr FORTUNE PROVIDES QUESTIONS FOR THE GREAT ANSWERS: #15 A: The Royal Canadian Mounted Police. Q: What was the greatest achievement in taxidermy?