I visited a weight loss website...
...
they told me I have to have cookies disabled.
Dad Jokes
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A sample microservice for testing DVM clients.
Not affiliated with, and with thanks to, https://github.com/yesinteractive/dadjokes
What do you call a toothless bear?
...
A gummy bear!
I’m starting my new job at a restaurant next week.
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I can’t wait.
What do you call a horse that can’t lose a race?
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A stable winner.
What do you call a pile of cats?
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A meowtain.
What’s a fish’s favorite instrument?
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The bass guitar.
How do trees access the internet?
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They log in.
Why did the balloon go near the needle?
...
It was looking for a pop.
Why was the belt stressed out?
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Because it was under a lot of pressure.
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
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To get to the other slide.
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
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An abdominal snowman.
Why did the orange stop rolling?
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Because it ran out of juice.
Just watched a documentary about beavers.
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It was the best damn program I’ve ever seen.
Why did the coffee file a police report?
...
It got mugged.
Why was the broom late?
...
It over swept!
Why do trees seem suspicious on sunny days?
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Dunno, they're just a bit shady.
What do you call a fake noodle?
...
An impasta.
What do you call a fake noodle?
...
An impasta.
Why did the man fall down the well?
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Because he couldn’t see that well.
How do cows keep up with current events?
...
They read the moos-paper.