Narcissists expect accountability for everyone else except themselves. No one including themselves will ever hold them accountable. This would show they are human, rather than the perfection they try to portray to the outside world. It's a waste of our time and energy to try to hold them accountable. #grownostr
We usually want to know for sure if they're narcissistic or not, but that's usually not helpful. Lots of people have lots of dysfunctional patterns that aren't narcissists. It doesn't make what they do ok though. The most important thing is if it's toxic to us and if we want them in our lives. These are harder questions though. #grownostr
Narcissists will continuously put pressure on us to react now! They want this because it keeps us off balance and wondering when the next shoe will drop. This keeps them in control and us in confusion and overwhelm. Slowing down our responses allows us to regain some control over ourselves and our lives. #grownostr
Narcissists don’t want to heal. They just want control, no matter what chaos, drama and destruction it causes in their and anyone else's lives. Control and supply is the most important to them. They will stop at nothing in order to achieve this including destroying their own lives in the process. #grownostr
Here ya go. Finally got some video of me riding the mountain unicycle. I saw a friend on the trail and she got this video. Great ride yesterday. Hard AF. Need to ride more probably. 🤣🤷 #grownostr
It's a point most of us want to get to in order to truly move forward with our lives. There is grief in releasing the old version of ourselves and moving forward with the new version. Process and release these emotions and allow yourself to embrace the new version of yourself. You're worth it!❤
Narcissists will tell you they want to cooperate or work with you. This is a lie. They are simply trying to figure out how to make you comply with what they want. They have no intention of doing anything you want, only manipulating you into doing what they want. It's simply another one of their illusions! #grownostr
Being kind to other people is wonderful and it's a great thing to do and probably something we could all strive to do more of. What's even more essential though, is being kind to ourselves. It allows us to truly move forward with our lives without all the misery and stress of trying to whip ourselves towards what we want. #grownostr
Often our thoughts and emotions don't make sense, until we can make sense of them. Sometimes it feels awful and like we're stuck. Realize that nothing has gone wrong and we will make sense of what's going on in time as long as we allow ourselves to. We can't force it even if we want to. It must be allowed, just like all our other emotions. #grownostr
We aren't just heartbroken after abusive relationships. We lose ourselves, other relationships and often everything else in the process. It's not something many people can comprehend if they haven't gone through it. This is why it takes us so long to let go of it and come back to ourselves again. #grownostr
Grief shows up in all sorts of strange ways and strange times. It holds us back from doing the things we actually want to do often. It's also not something that's easy to "overcome" and that only works short term anyway. We must actually allow those emotions so we can process them in order to truly move forward. #grownostr
Narcissists will always expect you to choose them over everyone including yourself. However, they will never choose you. It isn't fair or right, but it's the truth. It doesn't mean we have to tell them this, but it does mean we need to be conscious so we can choose what's right for us. #grownostr
In order to let go of our emotions, we must first allow them to be there and face them. Only then can we use logic to help processing them. They must be acknowledged. Thinking that logically "we shouldn't feel like this" is avoiding and suppressing, not acknowledging and feeling. Do the work! #grownostr
I don't encourage anyone to call out narcissists, especially to the narcissist. It usually causes more harm than good and can be incredibly dangerous. It doesn't mean you need to be silent. I simply suggest doing it in ways and with people to ensure your own safety and not cause more drama and chaos in your own life. #grownostr
It sounds confusing because it is. They often mean everything to us until we see the truth. We also mean nothing to them if we're not being the perfect supply, and these are only fleeting moments. The missing piece is us learning to love ourselves. Then we can learn to let go of the emptiness. #grownostr
Narcissists use sex as a tool for manipulation, control and abuse. They may withhold it and then say it's for "these" reasons, but if you try to do what they say they need, they'll avoid it. When they need it they will shame you into it and they will definitely judge you either way. There's no win when we stay in these relationships. #grownostr
The experience I had with feeling anger felt different than I've ever felt before. It was not so much an emotion controlling me as I was simply experiencing it. It's taken me a lot of work to get here. I also know this is something that is possible for everyone if they choose to do the work. #grownostr
The feelings we had for even toxic or abusive people is real no matter what anyone says about it. Shame and judgement from ourselves or others does not help us to work through these emotions. It will often push people away instead. What we really need is kindness and compassion from ourselves and everyone else. #grownostr
We all go through it. It often feels like a struggle, but it doesn't mean it is or it has to be. It usually feels worse than it is and it's good when we allow it to surface, even though it doesn't feel that way. We get better over time and our capacity and capability grows. Releasing these things is life altering! #grownostr
Narcissists are masters of deception. If they think you are going to leave and they don't want you to, they will change things. Let's be clear though, this is only enough and for long enough to keep you there. Then it's back to business as usual. The only reality they live in is their illusion! #grownostr
