Narcissists speak about any of their issues in generalities, which allows them to always avoid any actual accountability. They’ll only talk specifically about the “good” things about them. They will, however, be specific about everyone else’s issues. It’s all about their image to the world and protecting it. #grownostr
Narcissists are good at finding nice, vulnerable, caring people and pushing their boundaries to get everything they think they deserve. All the while never giving anything back that's not used for manipulation and control, whether now or later. Boundaries break this cycle. We don't have to settle! #grownostr
Many times when we're healing and feeling good, it will allow space for old or painful emotions to surface. This doesn't mean you're going backwards, often it's the opposite. We've often made enough space for these emotions to surface and that's good. We are reaching new levels of healing. #grownostr
Narcissistic relationships are confusing because everything is subtle and hidden. It’s also not all bad all the time or we would leave. We hold onto hope and every breadcrumb we get hoping things will get back to the way they were. The way it was and the hopes are the illusion that keeps us stuck though.
I help survivors of narcissistic abuse reclaim their independence and manage their minds. #grownostr
We definitely can develop tendencies that look like narcissism from the outside after being in abusive relationships. It’s often a defense against the abuse and it doesn’t mean we’re a narcissist or will become one. It’s good to be aware of our tendencies to work through and heal them, but not to beat ourselves up with.
I help survivors of narcissistic abuse reclaim their independence and manage their minds. #grownostr
We've all gone through things in our lives, but this isn't who we are. It's not easy to discover who we really want to be, but it's something everyone deserves. You are exactly who you decide to be and become and you are the only one who can decide this for yourself! Allow yourself to let go of the past and move into a future you want!
I help survivors of narcissistic abuse reclaim their independence and manage their minds. Healing is inevitable when you have the right tools and support. #grownostr
The subtle signs of isolation and abuse are really hard and sometimes impossible to see until later in the relationship or even after we get out. Narcissists are really good at hiding anything we could point to that was actually isolating us. It doesn’t mean it isn’t happening just because we don’t have concrete evidence though. #grownostr
Trusting ourselves is hard enough after toxic relationships. Trusting everyone else is even harder. Good, genuine people actually expect that trust builds as the relationship does. We don’t owe trust to anyone for any reason. We all get to do the work to earn the trust. #grownostr
First of all, this is not something for us to shame or judge ourselves about. This is definitely something for us to become consciously aware of though. It is very hard to find solutions to move forward with our lives while we are only focusing on the problems. Acknowledge them, then move forward. #grownostr
Narcissists are all so very different, which makes it incredibly hard to spot them. I don’t think anyone can simply just spot all of them in first meeting them. It takes time to get to know them. Some will show themselves sooner than others, just as some are more severe narcissists than others. #grownostr
Too many people doubt they have the strength it takes to heal from narcissistic abuse. If you made it through it, you have all the strength you need. It's not scarier or harder to heal, it's just different. Unlike toxic relationships, healing gets easier over time. Get the support and do the work! #grownostr
Narcissists and their abuse doesn’t make sense to us, because they don’t behave like us. We can’t understand why they do what they do because we wouldn’t do it to someone else. The biggest thing is understanding that they are the way they are, even if we don’t understand it. #grownostr
Narcissists don't want you to talk to anyone about anything going on in your life. Part of this is for isolation, but part of this is so they can keep you questioning your own reality and off balance. They don't want you or anyone else to figure out what's actually going on. Break the silence and get the support! #grownostr
We want to be truly seen and heard by another person especially in the healing process. This is healing in itself. Of course we want to work through the issues, but it’s much harder to do this without having someone who truly sees you and understands what you went through. #grownostr
After being gaslit for years we lose trust in our thoughts and intuition. It happens slowly over time and this the the same way we must gain it back. This isn't something we can wait for, we must do the work to regain it. It's not easy, but that's one of the steps in getting your life back and you're worth it! #grownostr
We search for clues, if they are a narcissist and how we will know for sure. The truth is that often we won't be able to truly know for sure no matter how much we learn. The more important truth is that it doesn't actually matter. If we are not being treated in a way that is kind, loving and supportive. This is probably the only sign we need to see to know that this is not a healthy relationship. If they are not willing to admit, face and actually work on these things. Then we have to decide how long we actually want to continue with this kind of relationship. #grownostr
When we realize we’re in an abusive relationship and we need help and support to get out. It’s usually going to feel like we are betraying them in talking to anyone else about our relationship or getting help to get out. This is a lie they’ve programmed us with. We are not betraying them! They already betrayed us when they abused us! #grownostr
Enough time being gaslit in our lives and it may be months or years later and we still question ourselves. Learning to trust our own thoughts again is a process that takes time. It requires time and consistent work to heal. Be kind and patient with yourself. You deserve the same compassion you offer everyone else! #grownostr
I’ve wondered often over the years, how many more narcissists were in my life than I already knew about. I think this is a regular thing for us to think about on our healing journey. The important part is for us to not beat ourselves up for something we didn’t yet know. Be kind to you! #grownostr
We need safe places where we can talk about and get support in working through things in our lives. If we’re in relationships where that’s not ever ok, that’s not a healthy relationship, especially if we can’t discuss it in a healthy way with our partner. In this case we need to find support anyway. #grownostr
