Recommend this book:

Goodreads

Us: Getting Past You and Me to Build a More Loving Rela…

Stop working on yourself as an individual and start wor…

I do not completely agree with everything (he has different definition of individualism than I have, so I needed to translate it in my head during reading), but for relationship and better understanding of partner and even myself (and my own mistakes), it was good. Very very good. And he had similar table in that book, maybe more detailed.