Submission as Appeasement

Appeasement is often conflated with submission. This is somewhat understandable because when people think of a submissive guy they typically imagine a man who is appeasing and self-erasing. Needless to say, this type of submission isn't appealing in a relationship, because appeasement is a form of self-preservation, not love.

When a man submits through appeasement, his energy is directed inward. It may look like he's giving, but his core motives may be:

• escaping his own discomfort
• managing Her emotions
• seeking Her approval
• easing guilt or fear
• avoiding conflict
• hiding insecurity
• protecting himself

To appease is to hide emotionally, to abandon presence, and the result is that he's not truly serving Her essence, but his own discomfort and needs.

It's important to realize that, energetically speaking, appeasement is formless and destabilizing; it is a dissolution of a man's masculine energy. When he turns inward and orients himself, his energetic structure breaks down. The act looks like deference, but it actually orients the self, making submission feel more like manipulation or a transaction than an expression of love. This is what makes it feel so untrustworthy.

Submission As Devotion

If we understand the masculine principle to be stability, presence, and awareness, it's easy to see how it becomes compromised through appeasement. This is why it's so important for a man be aware of the true intention for his submission. Since masculine energy is cultivated internally yet directed externally, a man's submission should be fueled by devotion and flow outward toward his Beloved. It's meant to be a channel, not its own endpoint.

Through devotion, submission doesn't feel like a request, negotiation, or plea—it feels more like an offering, a gift. It becomes a conduit through which Her energy and love can flow, a foundation in which Her truest self can be expressed. And through devotion, a man's inner structure is directed toward something beyond himself, which embodies the true, vertical, metaphysical masculine.