I must admit that when I went back to the relays option after some updates of Amethyst I got quite confused. I'm still not sure my setup is fully optimized but at least I more or less get it now, thanks.
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Have you chosen 1 or 2 home relays that MUST have all your posts? That's the first step.
I have nostr band, damus and snort. I had a fourth one, a relay that was running on my Umbrel accessible with a public url but I had to shut it down as it was slowing down my node too much.