In my experience it is hella weird looking at someone in the eyes through a phone. I think it's because the action is stilted and forced where IRL human interaction relies more on a massive amount of subtle cues and bits of direct and indirect eye contact to emphasize points.
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Yeah, it could be because we were trying pretty hard to 'look in each other's eyes' as we were talking... Which, honestly, I'm sure didn't help.
Have you seen any promising tech in this regard?
nope. The next gen oculus maybe, has eye tracking. I would wait for opensource to come out tho, if that really does start to work at the hardware level.