spark would only make sense for small amounts, as that is not economical to go onchain. I prefer the graduated wallet approach where a real lightning channel gets created after some threshold, but there are still so many ux issues with that like offline receive. I dunno man

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Yes; graduated wallets are absolutely the way forward imo. Zeus is nice but ecash was the wrong decision and the UX isn't clean. Custodial Bolt12 to Sov Bolt12 would've been better...but def worth chatting with the Pubky team about Paykit and community credit. It's really all very marvellous, and paints a very bright vision for the future.
I have been testing wallets to select the best one to onboard no-coiners at local meetups but it turned out as a nightmare. Firet they are way too many wallet out there to choose and not even one is close enough to be user friendly for a newbie. You talk about Bitcoin but then the Phoenix wallet talk about Lightning and worse, ask you to pick one option while paying without explaining what it means. Other like BlueWallet through at you a mnemonic phrase to backup on second screen before you can even do anything, hard to make it more scary to a new comer. Zeus is just a huge mess with so many questions and leaving default end up with ecash and mint to choose from, with zero option to get you first bitcoins from an onchain transaction. And I'm not talking about the ones that want your phone number to start or the one showing the Bitcoin symbol for sats...or absolute worst, the one with 20 Bitcoin layer to choose from.