Yes, I'm certain I'm doing something wrong.
Seems like something a explanation video would help fix for a lot of us
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Way too many inbox/Outbox.
Pick 3 Outbox relays that you know have ALL your posts. Or pick the 3 that youi know will not delete your stiff.
Pick 3 Inbox relays that are free so any one can write for you.
They can be the same. But Outbox can be paid, inbox must be free (otherwise you don't get notifications).