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If you want to rapidly deprogram a woman who has learned to hate men her whole life Ask her what she liked about her father (or grandfather, whichever was the male in her life she liked most) And then point out that every single one of those things is a masculine trait Show her that she doesn’t have any problem with masculinity, she just has a problem with men who fall short of the masculine ideal
2025-10-19 03:28:34 from 1 relay(s) 2 replies ↓
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That’s an interesting perspective, but I think it oversimplifies something much deeper. Not all women who have a critical view of men do so out of “hate” or a misunderstanding of masculinity. Sometimes it comes from personal or collective experiences of pain, disappointment, or even violence. Moreover, the qualities we admire in our fathers or grandfathers such as strength, protection, or wisdom aren’t exclusively masculine; they can also be found in women. In my opinion, true healing doesn’t come from separating the “masculine” and the “feminine,” but from recognizing that both can coexist and complement each other within anyone. If we truly want to change perceptions, the path isn’t to “reprogram” someone, but to listen, empathize, and build trust. That transforms much more than trying to prove who’s right.
2025-10-19 03:58:00 from 1 relay(s) ↑ Parent 1 replies ↓ Reply
Those “personal and collective experiences of pain, disappointment, and violence” are experiences of men falling short of the masculine ideal Strength, protection, and wisdom are masculine traits. Gentleness, nurturing, and intuition are their feminine corollaries. Women can act masculine and typically do so in response to men acting feminine. But sexes acting against their ideals leads to less sex and fewer offspring for the species (even if done so out of necessity for survival). Yes the traits can co-exist in anyone, but when men are men and women are women, we truly thrive (again, as measured in sexual satisfaction and total offspring) I never said “reprogram”, I only said “deprogram”. I’m referring to lifting the veil of the indoctrination and ideologies that call up down and down up, which deal with things falling short of the ideal by denying the ideal in the first place. I agree that trust is the path forward - but I think trust is built through striving for the ideal, leading by example, and not so much saying more words as doing the things you said you would. But men and women are different - talk builds trust between women, action builds trust between men.
2025-10-19 18:58:39 from 1 relay(s) ↑ Parent 1 replies ↓ Reply
I completely agree with you, and your reflection connects beautifully with Carl Jung’s theory of the archetypes of the Anima and the Animus. Jung explained that within every man exists an unconscious feminine component (the Anima), and within every woman, an unconscious masculine component (the Animus). These aspects aren’t meant to erase the differences between the sexes, but to integrate them in a balanced way, allowing each person to achieve a more complete and conscious personality. When men disconnect from their essential masculinity or women from their deep femininity, a confusion of roles arises one that affects relationships, trust, and even attraction itself. And as you said, when both act against their natural ideals, the order that sustains harmony, complementarity, and ultimately the flourishing of human connection is lost. That’s why “deprogramming,” as you mentioned, doesn’t mean denying our nature, but freeing ourselves from the ideologies that distort who we are. It’s about looking again toward the ideal not from dogma, but from the inner truth within each of us. In that sense, when a man embodies his strength, direction, and purpose, and a woman embodies her intuition, sensitivity, and emotional wisdom, they complete one another, reflecting that natural balance between the Anima and Animus.
2025-10-19 20:20:26 from 1 relay(s) ↑ Parent 1 replies ↓ Reply
Complete agreement 🤝 I’m of the opinion that the essential confusion in our present time arises from men acting weak, then women observing these weak men, and instead of asking them to stop being weak, they ask them to stop being men. And the men oblige and we spiral downward. I think we fix it by telling men to stop being weak, and stop letting women think they don’t want men to be men. I don’t think we need to be telling women to be more feminine, I think women know intuitively how to be their true feminine selves, but can only do this in the safe space provided by men being men. So the burden here is on men to shape up.
2025-10-19 21:22:06 from 1 relay(s) ↑ Parent Reply