I'm probably going to attract trolls with heavy cognitive dissonance by this post, who didn't think through its meaning, but whatever: Nostriches: Potato, become an egg! Potato: How? I'm a potato. Nostriches: You need the boiling water! Potato: I told you, I'm a potato, it doesn't harden me, it softens me! Nostriches: Well, become an egg then! (return to second line and repeat, or go off into how being a potato is a moral failing etc.) (The mandatory: Not all nostriches of course. But probably 3/4 of them.)