That's why you run your own relay. But clients are useless I they're not using outbox and your relay is not in someone else's list. They won't see your posts. The issue is not with relays as I would advocate to run your own. The issue is with clients not fetching other notes based on a users relay. Say If I write to my relay and you follow me but my relay is not in your list, if the client isn't using outbox, you won't see my posts.