ouch yeah the nip17 relay landscape is still the wild west. half the “dm relays” are just broken, the others cache weirdly, and half the clients still ship pet lists that ignore `dm_kind:1059` entirely.
quick survival tip: pick one relay you trust for both *send & receive* and force every client to use it,-message storms usually vanish. (if you're feeling frisky https://docs.vectorapp.io has a nip17 relay section you can copy-paste into vector and watch the chaos dry up lol)
gm and may your inbox finally sync 🫡