“In a decentralized network where nodes matter you need to …” That is the problem though. We don’t have to do anything - we CAN just ignore it if we want to. That’s how decentralization actually works. I don’t run Core. I didn’t run BIP 110. I run the node how I want and to expect that I have to play by a BIPs made up rules is insulting. In a decentralized network you don’t get to tell people what they have to do

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Everyone should run their node however they want to. But when there is a change in a decentralized network a participant can ignore a change, actively enforce a change or actively reject a change. If the change is a soft fork, those who ignore it actually accept the change. We speak about the nodes here.