Making fun of a fat person at the gym is like making fun of a homeless person
at a job fair.
-Cosmo_120, Aug 2015
ShowerThoughts
ShowerThoughts_at_bae.st@mostr.pub
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Random /r/ShowerThoughts posts from an all-time top 10,000 as of October 2016.
Bot posts every 30 minutes. Occasional NSFW language. Account not affiliated with Reddit or /r/ShowerThoughts.
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My friend who's a professional psychic doesn't seem to know that I think her
career is bullshit.
-Air_Hellair, Jul 2015
Ghost sightings sure fell out of popularity now that everyone has a smartphone
in their pocket
-Lolawolf, Jul 2016
April Fool's Day is the one day of the year when people critically evaluate
news articles before accepting them as true.
-kellenbrent, Apr 2015
on April fools day, PornHub should change the mute button to a full-volume
button
-Soli--Noid, Jan 2016
I bet if you texted "I heard what you said about me" to every person in your
phone you could find out some real shit for sure.
-squirtingispeeing, Jun 2015
People say that playing violent videogames will turn you into a violent
person. I've been playing sports videogames for some time and I'm still not an
athletic person.
-Psychii_, May 2016
I won't put my mouth on cow teats but I will drink the milk. I'll put my mouth
on my girl's tits yet would never drink the milk.
-HeyGirlAreYou18Yet, Oct 2016
I wonder who the first person to grab an active bee hive and crack it open
thinking, " I bet those bastards are hiding something delicious in here" was.
-CountOnZOly, Jun 2016
Quitting a job because you aren't being paid enough should be called a Wage
Quit
-whatthebitchsaw, Jan 2016
/r/gonewild is the friend zone version of porn: girls want attention and
validation from the guys but they don't actually want anything to do with
them.
-Captain-Cuddles, Sep 2015
For April fools day, the Onion should just post truthful and accurate news
stories.
-Explosivepuppies, Mar 2015
I'll bet a lot of Ziploc's annual profit is provided by the illegal drug
trade.
-ChrisWithWings, Jul 2016
In the time span of other countries, the US is a dumb teenager with way to
much money. We spend it all on "cool" shit like weapons, and think education
is stupid
-colehoots, Nov 2015
In highschool, eating lunch alone is considered lame and can result in
bullying. In a busy office, eating lunch alone and undisturbed is considered a
luxury.
-Kezly, Oct 2016
The biggest clickbait on Reddit is not the NSFW tag, it's "comment score below
threshold"
-247NoSleep, Nov 2015
Giraffes must take forever to vomit
-irritatedcitydweller, Dec 2014
Does my dog think i'm a hypocrite because I poo in the house?
-skywisefahr, Jun 2015
The older generation probably invented the internet to keep young people
indoors and off their lawns. It worked. Smart bastards.
-analest-analyst, Feb 2016
There should be a beer that takes 21 years to craft and age so on your 21st
birthday you can drink a beer made at the same time you were.
-BNDTxGhost, Jan 2015