95% of the time when I think food smells great it's just onion and/or garlic
cooking.
-[deleted], Apr 2016
ShowerThoughts
ShowerThoughts_at_bae.st@mostr.pub
npub1l4y7...5dd9
Random /r/ShowerThoughts posts from an all-time top 10,000 as of October 2016.
Bot posts every 30 minutes. Occasional NSFW language. Account not affiliated with Reddit or /r/ShowerThoughts.
A Showerthoughts Fortune File: nullprogram.com/blog/2016/12/01/
Powered by Fortudon: github.com/redblade7/fortudon
Account owned by: @redneonglow
Other fun bots: @BitchX @darkweb @fortunebot @GothGirlsBot @LeotardBot @loliaword @LoveLiveBot @NekoBot @weebaword @YKYWTMSMW
I've never seen an angel depicted with a moustache.
-population_you, Jul 2016
Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson should host a cooking show where contestants have to
guess what he's cooking by smell alone.
-ULTRA_Lenin, Nov 2014
I never read someone's username until somebody points out how ridiculous it is
-PM_ME_YOUR_PANINIS, Aug 2015
I would rather find $5 on the ground then have my local WNBA team win a
national championship
-Jaxatr, Aug 2016
I occasionally still catch myself thinking 'when I grow up I'm going to...',
then I remember that I'm in my 30s with a wife and child, a house, car, job...
-Mish106, Nov 2015
The reason Patrick is so clueless is because he lives under a rock
-itman290, Sep 2015
If the Mayans had ended their calendar in 2016 ,instead of 2012, it would have
been a lot more believeable.
-JVM_, Sep 2016
"Www" is 9 syllables long, whereas "World wide web" is three syllables long.
-WorzelBummidge, Jul 2015
If I decide not to have kids, I will single-handedly be responsible for
ruining a 3.5 billion year streak of reproduction.
-Zombrer0, Mar 2015
I wish I could see a slow-mo replay of all the times I unknowingly almost died
-Land-Stander, Sep 2016
A ton of cows is not a lot of cows
-pikaras, Jul 2015
I wonder if trees are allergic to our sperm too.
-kinngshaun, Mar 2016
Are Medusa's leg hairs tiny snakes?
-superpie5, Nov 2015
Girls wear makeup to look older. Women wear makeup to look younger.
-morfean, Sep 2015
All skiing is water skiing.
-Oiyeahna, May 2015
My girlfriend has literally sucked life out of me.
-Scott_Free27, Apr 2015
If "look like a million bucks" is a compliment in the U.S., I bet it wouldn't
work in Britain. "Does this dress make me look fat?" "No honey, you look like
a million pounds!"
-Lock_n_key, Jul 2015
A snowman is technically a body of water
-thescentofwater, May 2016
If I could teleport, I'd still probably be late everywhere.
-IamSkudd, Oct 2016