KIKI 's avatar
KIKI
woefulwealth93@walletofsatoshi.com
npub1jmmm...y8hm
Crowley’s Lovechild
Who are we? What are we? Where are we? Stardust Stardust Star ⭐️ dust
If your stalker stops stalking it’s because you’re boring.
The Spark ⚡️ of Life It could have been different. He could have died in my arms that night and then what? I would have been permanently scarred mentally for the rest of my life. I would eventually have lost my mind simply by having to bear the future in nightmare mode. His death in my arms would have been my own yet his victory over death became my victory over insanity. I was at the peak of my crown chakra opening and I had been given several spiritual gifts only bestowed to dedicated mystics. Granted I was only 20 years old yet I considered myself an old soul and I had done more by twenty than most had done by fifty. I started partying early around twelve to be precise. By fourteen I had been plucked and by seventeen I had surpassed a double digit body count full of one night stands with drunken high school boys. At nineteen I became a celibate and practiced abstinence as a zen Buddhist discovering Christianity. Typical nineties girl I was a product of the times: a liberated female bodhisattva in an urban rat race. Then I smelled the putrid scent of society and disappeared for twenty long years. Now I’m back. Like Zeina I come to reclaim what’s mine before I let go of everything and disappear into the woods for good. I still have that spark and zest for life only I don’t have the wits to face the world head-on and so I retreat like a defeatist. Sometimes people wonder where I get all of my energy from yet right now I’m more depleted than ever so whatever energy I used it’s gone and now I’m broken and back to square one where this all started at twelve going on thirteen. It was 1989 and Sinead O’Connor had came out with her hit single, “Nothing Compares to You.” It was transfixing. It was poetry. It was soul. Keep the campfire burning, you never know who’s looking for a drum circle in the middle of the night. The campfire is where we find the sparks of life.
I dreamed again of Dickie Spencer and this time we French kissed 💋 as he gently fondled my left breast. Oooo warm and fuzzy 🥰 vibes from the astral realm this morning. Dragon 🐉 energy
The thought of his touch brings a chill to my bones. To survive is to cease desire once and for all. The diamond will crack under extreme pressure.
To being ghosted by the ghost 👻 I shall be toasting with this toast 🥂 Crowley’s breath upon my skin; His moon 🌝 child procured in the light 💡 of sin. Moonchild wander far and yonder, No escape in a maze of the gaze. Eyes 👀 wide shut I talk to the hand ✋🏼 I don’t make a lotta money 💵 or own bitcoin like 👍 that
I’m learning to unlearn all that I’ve learned. Belief becomes an impediment if it becomes rigid. For what is true today may not be true tomorrow, even science must be scrutinized as a valid belief system. Mind must be fluid when it wants to flow. The power of mind is in the imagination. image
The Surrender (to KAOS BABALON) When one surrenders to Chaos (or KAOS), he relinquishes his need for control. Control gives one a sense of power whereas KAOS utterly subdues him, and that is why many fear approaching the Abismal waters for fear of drowning in her omnipotent waters. The fear of death prevents man from tapping into the dark feminine which is the death agent in a metaphorical respect. For it was Tiamat in her rage that caused the original creation of dragons that cannot be tamed, yet Marduk was able to subdue them with one slice of his blade. Order ensued with the parting of Sky and Earth yet despite this separation there remained a Void, or the dark matter (The Dark Mother) holding everything in place, namely from chaos emerged order and to kaos shall return order as the law of entropy in physics. Chaos shows no mercy for order and that is why the adept abandons his sense of control and surrenders to the Dark Mother who gives him the vision of the dragon as she opens his and her own eye. To be in the dragon’s company one must become as a babe in the abyss, namely as one who abandons all need for control. Marduk will have to make amends in the battle of Armageddon when KAOS reigns once again. KAOS shows no mercy and this is how She strengthens man. image
Well 2023 was an emotional roller coaster due to a bout of spiritual psychosis that lasted from spring to summer. The internet is the trigger but only if it gets interpersonal. As long as o stay distant I’m in the clear. I feel nothing towards ge who holds the trigger as I created him and the trigger in order to get triggered. Sad but true. Cheers 🥂 to 2024 where my apotheosis awaits or not who cares desire for apotheosis impedes apotheosis so I’m literally back at square one ☝️seeking the Book of Pleasure in my daily interactions. I don’t forgive I don’t forget I simply move on with a stain upon my heart. It is what it is I care less for Christ consciousness than I do for my coffee brand. Zen to the core. Atheist satanist Muslim spins on wheel 🛞 of life. I thought I wanted friends but all I want is to penetrate the void more and more resonance is all