Twitter is so hostile. I offered some friendly advice that saving in dollars results in loss of purchasing power and the guy accused me of being a “crypto bro” Hurtful. HFSP

With all the time and resources I’m putting into growing mushrooms I wonder if it would’ve been more economical to just mine bitcoin 🤔

Hace fruited hundreds of bags of mushrooms over the last few months… yet the only one I really want seems to be taking *forever*

Going to use NOSTR as a personal diary and massive public over share (I’m great at doing that) so apologies in advance… Some of you already know pieces of this story but possibly not the whole thing. Since 2009 I was partner and builder of a small software “startup”. I always had grand visions of scaling it massively and we were perfectly positioned to do so in the industry but the majority owner and “face” of the company was content making just enough - so it stayed as a $500k revenue business. Fast forward to 2019 he was suddenly battling pancreatic cancer which resulted in a rapid decline and “departure” within 5 months. There was talk of selling to a competitor but in all honesty I don’t think he could’ve pulled it off in such a short timeframe. Not liking the thought of becoming an employee and seeing it as an opportunity to turn our product into what I always wanted I re-mortgaged our house and bought him out - with promises of much assistance and mentoring for the other side of the business - due to his cancer that never played out. I couldn’t do it alone and not liking the idea of so much debt (I’m not a fan of debt in general) I brought on a business partner on the tech side and an employee on the customer service / sales side - both were acquaintances, the tech partner being someone I worked with years before. It was at this point I’d learned that my previous partner months prior had a massive falling out with one of our largest groups of clients and they had set in motion an exodus plan that they refused to reverse - I was going to lose potentially half the business due to no fault of my own and they were not interested in reconciliation. I warned both my new partner and employee and gave them an opt out - they both chose to push ahead anyway… so we set ahead with a mad scramble to get them both up to speed on the business and then attempt find new clients to continue… I was carrying a massive weight on my shoulders being the only one with knowledge / history of our product and client base, feeling like I had somehow already ruined the lives of these 2 guys and needing to work relentlessly to find a solution. And relentlessly I worked - 14+ hour days scheming, coding, managing the business, training and even sales (those who know me know this is not my jam at all - but I do what I must to survive)… the level of work was insane but it was actually enjoyable to grind like that - what broke me was the stress and anxiety that was rapidly building and I could not work out how to release and let it go. I felt like my partner wasn’t providing anywhere near the value he should and the employee while great at support / customer service just could not provide what he had promised on the sales side - there was a lack of confidence he had in his knowledge of the product and industry and that comes across loudly when you’re selling to sales people. To top it off I didn’t want to spend any more money offloading my workload to anyone else - revenue was dwindling and I honestly didn’t know how to find good help. I started drinking every night to help get to sleep. I started enjoying and craving the numb feeling it gave me. I was on a rapid downward spiral. Then covid hit… as a predominantly online business we were able to continue operating fine but we were not able to sell (face to face is needed) and we had to rapidly adapt our products to help our clients continue operating. It was actually quite remarkable how great we were in this environment but still we were unable to sell… and as the exodus continued combined with our clients businesses collapsing our numbers fell dramatically. The good old money printer sustained the business largely over that period - without it I would’ve had to fire. Towards the end of lockdowns as the government teat started to dry up i recommended to my support guy he start looking for a better opportunity - though I’d keep him on as long as possible. He found something and left. Over the time I put forward many ideas for new products to attempt shaking things up and reinvent the company. The industry now is largely being eaten up by one of the large well funded competitors so I felt we needed to do something wildly different to have a chance at survival. Everything I came up with was largely met with apathy from my partner - he seemed to have no interest in even trying. Burnt out, hating the industry and not really seeing any way forward we vaguely agreed to just let it run until it was no long economical - no more new features - just let our customers gradually find alternative options… essentially just let the business die Although this was a very conscious decision any time things move a step closer to that end it still bubbles up uncomfortable anxiety and occasional depression - largely around a feeling of failure but I can’t help also feel that is largely due to the money. Fortunately over the time I also found a more meaningful path - building in bitcoin. A path where I feel I can at least contribute in some small way to building the world I want to see… though at times I question whether we’ll get there… Anyway that’s enough from me for now

A storm, it comes our way And those who rise through distorted lies Poison in the veins But we like to point the blame, blame, blame, blame It's easier to blame But point the mirror at ourselves We're all part of this old money game

3 months… time to seriously get building!

I've been crawling on my belly Clearing out what could've been I've been wallowing in my own confused And insecure delusions For a piece to cross me over Or a word to guide me in I wanna feel the changes coming down I wanna know what I've been hiding…

Going out for orders this morning #shroomstr

Get it in your ear holes View quoted note →

When hyperbitcoinisation happens I’m going to re-learn guitar so I can play like Tash Saltana… and my wife is going to hate it

Growing lionsmane never gets old #shroomstr

Is there a NOSTR app for sharing a task / todo list? #askstr

How the heck has @Whitney Webb not been disappeared already? 🧐

Black king oysters #shroomstr

Where do I subscribe? There’s at least 4 talented people down here that would attend View quoted note →

#dogstr

A nice half kg cluster of winter white oysters #shroomstr

Some of the worst mushrooms I’ve grown… Elongated stems due to high levels of CO2 running new fruiting chamber without any extraction fan. Extraction now sorted although no fan for fresh air intake yet and timing will need some adjustment. We’ll see how the fruit improves from here #shroomstr

450g black king oyster cluster